いよいよお盆です。多くの方が墓参りをされています。参られる理由は様々でしょうが、やはり、ご先祖様の「恩」を噛みしめ、幸せを再認識する為ではないでしょうか。これは 人間の最も尊い行為です。ただ 「恩」は、誰も教えてくれません。気付くしかないのです。「恩を感じろ！！」っていう説教は、野暮ですから…（苦笑）。こういった機微は、ある意味センスなのかもしれません。
今回も彼岸寺さまの説法を引用します。
インドでは恩を「クリタジュナ」と言いました。「なされたことを知る」というのが語源です。自分がご両親からどんなことをしてもらったか。まずは思い出してみましょう。仏教での恩は「返す」より、まずは「知る」ものです。そもそも、人は人に完全な恩返しをすることはできません。これまでかけてもらった愛情も時間もお金も、そのまま返すことはできない。それに、ご両親もそれを望んではいないでしょう。それならば、いまのあなたができる形で、身近な方に振り向けてみてください。パートナーやお子さんなど、身近な方を大事にしましょう。（『小さな心から抜け出すお坊さんの１日１分説法』 永岡書店）
このように「恩」は、知ることから始まります。” 心 ” の上に ” 原因 ” と書いて「恩」。恩知らずの特徴は、①柔軟性がなく、自らの正義（こうあるべき！という偏った価値観）に生きる人、②効率重視（自らの進め方）しか認められない潔癖な人、③もっと感謝されるべき！と自らの苦労をアピールする人 が挙げられます。すべて「自分、自分、 自分」・・・自己中心的なトライアングルにはまるのです。このような人は、最初はいい人を演じますが、時とともに自分が偉くなったと勘違いし、人を見下す傾向にあります。そして、常にイライラ … 忘恩のトライアングルの中でしか生きられず、他人を批評し、恩を恨みに変えてしまうのです。どんな恩を受けても満足がいきません。周りのお陰でなく、自分のお陰・・・最終的に、自らの正当性を主張して 責任放棄の繰り返し・・・色々な方の心遣いがあっての自分なのに … 。孤独の ” 原因 ” を 自らの ” 心 ” が作り出しています。つまり「我」を捨てることが、「恩」を知る第一歩なのです。
先日、ある女性芸能人の告白がありましたね。綺麗な方なのに、目や眉がつり上がり、口がへの字になって … ☓（バツ）の顔になっていました … 失礼ですが ” 鬼 ” の状態です。本来 目指すのは、目尻が下がり、口角が上がる人 … つまり、〇（マル）の顔の人です。これを ” 菩薩 ” の状態といいます。恩知らずは、周りとの波長が合わなくなり、「自分には もっと素晴らしい世界があるんじゃないか？」と気になり始め、今を恨み、自分の正しさ・憐れさを主張して、次の環境へ進みます ・・・恩を感じることなく、環境をコロコロ変える鬼を ” 天の邪鬼（あまのじゃく） ” といいます。こういう人の行動は、次の環境で活躍できても ” 恩返し ” とはいいません。功徳が全く積まれていないので、幸せにはなれないのです。環境に慣れれば、また恨みとイライラの渇きの生涯を送ることでしょう。ただ、天の邪鬼は まだ可愛い鬼ですが、恐ろしいのは 最終的に ” 餓鬼（がき） ” の状態になることです。 気を付けましょうね。「恩」は ” 我 ” を捨てなきゃ、気付くことはできませんよ～。合掌
餓鬼になると取り返しがつきません。忘恩の トライアングルで、何も見えていないのです。
※今年も住職が 個別の特別施餓鬼（せがき）を勤めます。宗派問わず。布施の額は自由。参拝不要。後の勧誘は致しません。お願い事や戒名等を書いてお送り下さい。（１４日まで）。お盆で功徳を積めてない方は是非どうぞ。
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